I love you terribly. I do. But if you randomly bite my hand while I'm petting you one. more. time... I'll have to do something atrocious. Like lock you in the closet beneath the stairs. Until, of course, some giant man breaks down my front door and tells you about your real parents and whisks you away to...
I'm losing focus here.
The point is, when you're receiving one of those ear-scratchings you love so much, don't bite me. It discourages the ear-scratching.
Could you please do one of those Beauty and the Beast things where you jump into the sink and wash yourselves? Please?
You should just go for it already.
Your Girlfriend-Related-Advice Giver
I take personally your decision not to start and leave me stranded on campus yesterday. Just so you know. You're not getting vacuumed for a very long time as punishment.
(Maybe also because I hate vacuuming you.)
Annoyed but forgiving,
Dear Tranquil Mammoth,
In case you were wondering (not that you're reading) the links were inspired by you.