Sunday, November 29, 2009

Wedding Update #1

On Thanksgiving day my mom, aunt and I went location browsing.  I've always thought I wanted to be married outside in the summer, so we focused mainly on searching for a large open field that wasn't too far into the middle of nowhere.  Before we went home, I took them to this adorable church.  This is where Courtney and Ryan were married.  :) 

Mom and Aunt are completely sold.  They don't even want to look anywhere else.  In fact, they're trying to convince me to move the wedding inside instead of outside.  "But what if it rains?"  "Won't it be too hot?"  "What about bugs?"  (They're rather convincing.  The inside is pretty.) 

Anyhoo, the bottom two images are of the field outside to the left of the building.  The bottom one is an outdoor reception area.  If you look closely you can see snow in the photo of the pretty field.  It was cold

What do you guys think?  Opinions?  Arguements about the benefits of either an indoor or outdoor ceremony?  Just remember that it's almost winter.  Everything will look more alive and green in the summer time.  :) 

(You can click on the image to make it bigger.)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

A Celebration is in Order

My first Blogging Birthday is right around the corner, and in honor of it I'm hosting my very first blog hop!  :)  You are all hereby invited to my Blogging Birthday Bash

We will meet up here on December 16th to celebrate so many things:  the birth of new friendships, the blogging outlet for self-expression, the invention of birthday cake, and,  of course, some free and easy publicity for all of you fantastic readers. 

I'll upload my own party post, and you guys get to play along by creating yours.  What will you wear?  This is, after all, a black-tie event.  We must all be looking fab.  Who will you bring as a date?  How will you arrive? (Floo power?  Limo?  Hot air balloon?)  Who will you mingle with; do you have any friends coming?  Will you experience celebrity sightings?   Oh the possibilities...

Anyhoo, please RSVP to me before the party day via email with your name and the link to your blog and I'll add you to the guest list in the right sidebar so that you partiers can get to know each other.  :)  Then on December 16th you'll upload your party posts, and we'll all jump around the guest list to say "How do you do?"  (See?  Easy publicity.)  The guest list will remain in my sidebar for a week after the party date, just to be sure you all have enough time to visit each other.

If you'd like to participate, please steal the invitation below and spread the word, and on the party day please don't forget to link back to my blog in your post so that all of your readers can come as well.  EVERYONE is invited.  :)



And one more thing... 

This is a birthday party.  All birthday parties have presents, right?  And this one in particular has a present for one of you.  I have a pretty little box that's wrapped very nicely, and in that box is a special prize that I'll be giving away.  The winner's name will be randomly chosen from the guest list.

Wondering what's in the box?  Well I'll tell you:  One lucky reader is winning gift certificates to the wonderful worlds of Wal Mart and Starbucks, a copy of one of my favorite books of all time (no worries for my few male readers, it's not Twilight), and a "just for fun" surprise.  Or two.

Want the pretty box full of goodies?  You do?  Well then come to my party!   (Apparently I'm not above giving bribes...)

**NOTE **
If anyone needs help learning how to create a link, steal the banner, or complete any other seemingly simple task that's proving troublesome, please contact me via email for directions.  I've only beginning to realize how many of you lovely readers are new to this blogging thing.  ;)

Monday, November 23, 2009

Dear Future Baby,

I am positively longing for the day I get to hold you in my arms.  I watch other mothers and I press my hand to my unoccupied stomach and wish that you were in the world.  I want to experience everything about you.  I want to comfort you when you cry, laugh with you when you're happy, and support you in your goals.  I want to sit up with you when you're sick, and take you to school in the mornings, and bake you cupcakes for your birthdays.  You are going to be the most incredible blessing.

I want to watch you learn to walk and talk and read and explore.  I want to watch you discover your passions and dreams.  I want to watch you become a person completely independent of me.  I will rejoice and mourn in equal parts when that happens. I'll cringe when you get your driver's permit, and make your father take you out to practice as to avoid my inevitable panicking when you miss a stop sign.  And I can't wait to see you learn to love.

I hope you have his freckles and good luck and beautiful eyes...and perhaps a small portion of me.  Maybe my love of words and aversion to the military.  That would be nice.  I'd hate to have to miss you too.  I don't think I could handle worrying this much twice in one lifetime.  I hope my cooking has improved by the time you can eat solid food, and that bedtime stories are a good thing, because I'm really looking forward to telling them to you.

I can't wait to meet you, but I will wait, as patiently as possible, because I already love you enough to readily admit that I'm not at all ready for you.  I'm going to have to do quite a bit of growing first.  And besides, I want you to grow up in the midst of the very large family that will love you more than you'll ever know.  That can't happen if you come to me while I'm a whole ocean away from home.

I can feel you though.  I know that you exist in some future world I haven't reached yet.  I can practically hear your laugh and see your smile.  And I know you're coming, someday.  It will probably feel like the time flew when it gets here.

So...I'll see you soon enough, Sweetie.

All my love,
Your Someday Mom

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Blog Love

What can I say, the awards just keep coming in.  :)  I have two more to share today.  The first one is this Gorgeous Blogger Award from Avery over at You Don't Know Me.  Isn't this the cutest little award button ever?  This one is as simple as it sounds, you pass it on to other blogs that you find gorgeous. 

Thanks so much Avery!  I'm sorry it took me so long to get around to posting.

The second award comes from a blog that I'm new to, but one that I already love.  Clandestiny from Naked in the Closet is quite the intriguing writer.  Her posts are brilliantly written, entertaining, and thought-provoking, a trifecta that equals perfection in my books.  She is new to the blogging world, revealing bits and pieces of her true identity to us slowly.  ;)  If you haven't stopped by her blog yet, I am highly reccomending that you do so immediately.

I was honored when she gave me this Super Scribbler Award.  (THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!)  This one comes along with these rules:

- Properly thank whoever gave it to you. [check.]
- Snitch the button and put it on your blog. [check.]
- Tell your readers seven things they don't know about you.  [below.]
- Pass it on to seven more blogs.  [below.]
- Notify the winners. [as soon as I post.]

Now the tough part is trying to think of seven things I haven't already told you guys...oh bother.  (Yes, I did just quote Pooh Bear.)

Okay, here goes

  1. I dislike the smell of vanilla scented candles and lotions, but love vanilla ice cream, cake, and just about anything esle vanilla flavored.  It's weird, I know.  I just think the scent is too strong.


  2. I may seem like I have a lot to say here in my own little blog-world, but in real life, I positively shake when put in front of an audience.  Stage fright gets the best of me every time.


  3. If I could be play any character in any movie in the whole wide world, I'd play Bellatrix Lestrange in Harry Potter.  I have always preferred the evil characters to the good ones.  It just seems like they'd be so much more fun to play. 


  4. I do not understand society's idea of what love is.  Nearly everyone around me is in a relationship, but very few of them are really happy.  They bicker constantly, hurt each other without thinking twice, flirt with other people openly, lie about silly things and major issues equally, and show no signs of remorse for any of it.  I cannot even fathom calling a relationship like that "love."  I know that no couple is perfect and that problems will arise, but it seems like most don't even try to make things work.  It's like there is this universal attitude that real love doesn't exist anymore, and that makes me sick.  Real love only ceases to exist when everyone stops believing in it.  We all deserve it, but we also all need to be willing to work for it.  (Am I alone in this?  Anyone else fed up with how ridiculous this is getting?)


  5. I take more responsibility and initiative with this blog than I do with my classes sometimes.  (You guys rock!)


  6. I am addicted to post it notes.  It could become an unhealthy habit...


  7. I read Post Secret because the rare occasional happy secret renews my faith in mankind.  :)

Whew.  That's tougher than you would think.  And now for the nominees!  If you're blog is mentioned here, you may accept the award of your choice, and if you prefer not to, that's fine too.  I just thought you guys deserved the shout out.  :)

Nicole Addison from my teacups in peony
Elaine from A Heart 4 Heaven
Heather from Heather & Rick.
Amy from My LaLa Land
Natalie at Nat The Fat Rat
Postman from The Sentitous Vaunter

--

Also, some of you may remember Rachel from Confessions of a Virgin Blogger.  I showcased her here during the last awards post.  She is starting up a new blog project that I think is fabulous!  She's heading Prom No Go, a place for all those crazy prom photos you vowed you'd never show anyone.  ...except you have to show them.  On the internet.  It's for the good of society.  Everybody knows that laughter makes you live longer.  :)  For more details, or to submit your incredibly awful photos, click here

Friday, November 20, 2009

Proud to be a Twitard

Last night was the most hellish experience at a theatre EVER.  But you know what, it was worth it.  Because in the end, we watched Twilight and New Moon back-to-back in priority VIP seating.  Because we're just cool like that.

We arrived at 8:00pm, four hours early for the midnight showing, but there was already a gigantic line.  We bought tickets to see an early showing of Twilight, which scored us wristbands that gained us entrance to reserved seating.  (Perfect location:  First three rows of the upper section.  We were the first to arrive from the Twilight showing, so we were sitting front and center.  :] )

Our good luck ran out around the middle of the movie though.  Apparently the film was delivered wrong to theatres all over the state.  Half the rooms showing New Moon had film that was incorrectly spliced and the last half of the movie was shown upside down and completely backwards.  The dialogue was even reversed.  The problem could not be resolved, and we were given two options.  We could stay and watch the movie after it was finished playing in the theatres that were still working, or we could come back another time for free. 

We stayed, of course, because we're just hard core like that.  ;)  We didn't leave the theatre until 5:30am.  The staff gave all of us "rain check" cards to make up for the disappointment and inconvenience.  I now have five free movie passes to be used over the next six months.  I'm thinking it's a fair trade...

But back to the movie... Can someone say INCREDIBLE!  I thought it was a wonderful balance of "doing things by the book" and spicing up the action scenes for the screen.  My only complaint was that so much time was dedicated to the action that much the relationships were left to be assumed.  Not enough time was spent building the bond between Bella and Jacob, and the one between Bella and Edward was left completely to the imagination until their reunion at Volterra.  Even then, most of the beautiful heart-wrenching dialogue was cut.  :/ 

However, the chemistry between the actors was wonderful.  Kristin and Rob work well together, as does the pairing of Kristin and Taylor (*squeeeelll* for Team Jacob!).  The rivalry between the boys was portrayed wonderfully.  Both actors did their parts well:  Taylor as bitter and rejected, and Rob as calm and reserved.  The characters' personalities from the books showed through.  Edward is a bit more mature and willing to accept Bella's decision, whatever that may be, and Jacob was more determined and demanding, though without Edwards pathetically twisted idea of what is in Bella's best interests.  He at least knows Bella well enough to know that the worst thing he can do is abandon her, even if his presense is dangerous. 

And Victoria?  Ohmigosh.  :)  She was wonderful this time.  Her hair is finally the right color and her acting is superb.  She's a terrifying opponant.  Dakota Fanning made for a pretty creepy Jane as well.  I was really surprised.  She made a BIG step out of her "little kid" roles for this one.  The girl looked positively evil.

Anyhow, if you weren't able to see it last night, you should definitley go.  It was worth the lack of sleep and frustration at seeing a few spoilers upside down and backwards...  :)

Below are some photos of our Team Jacob awesomeness:




[Pictured: Me, Kylie, Courtney, Ryan and the line of dedicated fans that showed up around 8:00.]

So which team are you guys on?  Do you have pics to share?  Let us know by linking up your own New Moon post in the Mcklinky below.  :)



Thursday, November 19, 2009

Prepare Yourselves

Tomorrow night is the one we've all been waiting for.  Tomorrow night, we'll proudly don our Team Jacob tees, tie red ribbons in our hair, squeel like 12 year old girls, and make a mad dash to the theatre for the midnight premier of New Moon

[insert:  Baskets full of credit to Courtney Spradling for being amazing enough to score us 4 of the last 6 tickets sold to the premier nearly a month before the movie's release date.]

We are ridiculously excited for this, and somehow completely un-embarrassed.  Then again, we do have the right to be proud.  We've been around since the beginning.  And, you know, two of us kind of met Stephenie Meyer pre-movie deal.  (Yeah, I know I mention it a lot.  It's, like, one of the shining moments in my life...)  That makes us kind of awesome and old school as far as Twilight fans go.

Here is the trailer one more time for all you blogging lovelies.  I hope to see some of you out tomorrow night!  ;)


Also, if you guys are a Stephenie fan like me, you should head on over to her website pronto!  She mentioned something in the latest post about making The Host into a trilogy.  :)  Can you say EXCITEMENT!?!?

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Behold: Courtney's Epic Birthday Post

This past Saturday was a very important day.  It was so important, in fact, that we started celebrating it on Friday.  :)

[gift #1 = Coldplay]

Happy 22nd Birthday Courtney!

Courtney's birthday lasted the entire weekend.  She got to open one gift each day from Friday until Sunday, and on Sunday Kylie and I threw her a tea party dinner party.  (Psh.  You all know we're to old for tea parties.  Maybe.  Kind of.  But not really.)

[gift #2 = one of a kind coasters from B.B. Bellezza's lovley Etsy Shop.]

Ryan (the husband) took her out for a lovely evening Saturday, and they looked so smashing that I had to take some photos.


For the previously mentioned tea, uh, I mean, dinner party on Sunday, Kylie and I prepared a smorgasboard of delights.



[Yes, those are indeed home made tacos and pizza, and yes, the cookies were fabulous.]


[Courtney is not a fan of cake.  So she had a birthday cheesecake instead.]

It went off without a hitch.  In fact, Kyle even dropped in via webcam for a bit.  :)


And look at Courtney and Ryan's sensational party outfits.  Aren't they perfect?!?!


Courtney recently did a blog post about some of her favorite childhood toys that have been lost over the years.  She's been looking to try to regain some of them, and luckily for her I happened to have one of them.  By some divine act of God I was able to keep it a secret until her birthday.

[gift #3 = Polly Pockets.  Only the coolest toy on the planet.]

Now then, please leave some love for my soon-to-be-new-big-sister Courtney on her birthday! (Okay, okay, late birthday.)  =]

Monday, November 16, 2009

Perfection Has Its Faults

"I have to speculate that God himself did make us
into corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces."
-Iron and Wine, Such Great Heights

I am perfectly content in my little home.  I love it here.  I love almost everything about it, and I am ever grateful.  There is only one thing that makes me discontent, and it can't be helped.  I hate that I am sitting here alone.  I hate that I have made a home that I cannot share with Kyle.  I play his songs.  I snuggle up in his hoodies.  I remember the feel of his arm draped around me as I drift off to sleep:  the sensation of being his fragile girl, protected, warm and at peace, and sometimes it is so hard to hold myself afloat.  Sometimes I am drowning in the lonliness.  Sometimes it feels like my lungs can't function without him beside me, and not only is not beside me, he is 4,416 miles away from me.  (Yes, I googled it.) 

How can I possibly go on like this?  How can the world keep turning when a love such as ours is split?  How can people on the street not see how things are all broken while we're apart?  It doesn't seem possible that we should be able to fall asleep and wake up and go to work and come home and go through the many motions of smiling and frowning in turn.  It doesn't seem like we should be able to live apart.  It doesn't feel as if things are in balance this way.

And yet we do.  We do all of those things and so much more.  And we wait.  We wait for the day when it won't just be "going through the motions."  My God, that day cannot come soon enough.  Because when that day comes...  The world is not enough to contain the happiness that fills me.  Everything is light and good and pure and perfect.  And we are happy: one single happy entity that swallows up all the despair in the world and spreads smiles that infect even the bitter and the angry and the hopeless.  And it is beautiful, that feeling.  It is the most beautiful thing in life.  I hope that each and every one of you experience it.

It's like the first blossom of spring:  a rainbow bursting open against the grey that winter has left behind.  It's like the fleeting moment at the top of a particularly big swing when you believe with all your heart that if you'd just let go of the ropes you'd go flying off into the clouds.  It's like the innocent glee that comes of a cold puppy nose pressed to your cheek.  It's spinning in circles with your arms out wide, taking in everything at once so that all you see is a palette of swirling colors.  It's the first crisp and cool sip of water given to a man dying of thirst.  It is the bungee cord catching just as you begin to wonder if you'll live to see another morning.  It's the view from the highest mountain:  all encompassing and majestic.  It is perfect, simple, complex and wonderfully flawed love, and it is magnificent.

Unfortunately its absense is felt with all the same intensity.  Yet for all this pain, it is worth it, without question or doubt.  I wish that made it easy.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Domesticated

Over the last week and a half that I've officially been living on my own, I've been developing a routine.  I wake up at the same time each morning, I have classes and work from approximately 9:00-5:00 each day, and I do my chores and homework at night.  There is a specific laundry basket for towels, another for jeans, and one more for cotton things.  Garbage is taken out on Monday nights, and the bins are collected Tuesday morning.  Dishes are done on an almost daily basis.  Leftovers are kept no longer than four days.  Homework gets sqeezed in just before bed.  Dinner falls around six most nights, and is postponed when Kylie works late.

It may sound boring to all of you, but to me, having this normalcy is heaven.  Finally there isn't any more "going home on the weekends," forgetting things at Dad's, or day dreaming about having a place to bake.  At long last, I have a place to call my own.  :)  (I can't even begin to tell you how wonderful it is to finally have a kitchen.  Even with its limited cabinet space, I am thrilled.)

It's a lot of work keeping the place in order.  (Yes, Mom, you were right.  I did take everything you did for granted.)  But you know, I really don't mind it.  I love the feeling I get at the end of each day when I know that I've accomplished something, and it's amazing to watch my little house become a home.

So when I get home tonight, I'll be happily cooking another dinner, washing what already feels like my 1000th set of dishes, and starting yet another cylce of never-ending laundry, and I'll be pleased as punch about it.  I do believe, dear readers, that this one-time-CEO-wannabe has been thoroughly and effectively domesticated.  =)

It's kind of funny, isn't it, how life has a way of flipping your world upside down?

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Renovations Complete! (almost)

I am so excited to present to you guys the newly renovated carrotspeak.  =)

I'd been noticing lately that my sidebars were becoming very cluttered, so I set about straightening those up.  There are still a few features I'd like to add, but I couldn't wait to unveil my latest project. 

You'll note that there is now a new navigation bar at the top of the page with lots of options to explore.  They're pretty self explanatory, but I'd like to point out a few things:
  • First, note that on my new Blogroll, I've made an announcement about my new "Blogger of the Month" award.  :)  I am so excited to start this!  I've gained a few awards over the months, but I've never given one of my own.  This is going to be fun. 
  • Next, in my FAQ section I make a reference to my "Sponsers page."  The sponsers page isn't fully functional yet, as I'm still working out the kinks in my sponsering plan.  However, I have definitely decided that I'd love to take on a few.  If you are interested in sponsering carrotspeak, please send me an email so that I can provide you with rates and information for ads, giveaway deals, and features.
  • Third, check out the "Elsewhere" page to see other places I can be found on the web, and please read the information about adding me on MySpace/facebook before you send me a friend request.
I hope you guys enjoy!  I feel like this takes my humble little blog to a whole new level.  This has taken me days to accomplish, and as I said above, I'm not quite done yet.  :)  I still have a few things left to add... 

Don't be shy, let me know what you think!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Quick Update

Hey, guys.  I know I haven't been around a lot lately, and I'm sorry, but it's only because I'm working on something new for you.  :)  Hopefully I'll be finished with this new project by the end of the week and you'll all be able to see what's been keeping me so busy! 

I hope things are going well for you all, and I'll be back with a real post soon.

-Carrie

Monday, November 9, 2009

Remember, remember the fifth of November...

"Remember, remember the fifth of November:
The gunpowder treason and plot.
I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot..."

Welcome to the cheery post that was planned to be uploaded on Friday.  My friends and I are ardent fans of V for Vendetta, so we spent this November 5th gathered at my apartment for a special viewing.  We also made another of those delicious Snickerdoodle cakes like the one from this post.  :)


Whitney, Brianne,

and Kylie.  :)

For any of you who haven't seen the film, I highly reccomend it.  It's made my top 10 list.  What follows is a review found at Rotten Tomatoes:

Set against the futuristic landscape of totalitarian Britain, V For Vendetta tells the story of a young working-class woman named Evey who is rescued from a life-and-death situation by a masked man known only as "V." Profoundly complex, V is at once literary, flamboyant, tender and intellectual, a man dedicated to freeing his fellow citizens from those who have terrorized them into compliance. He is also bitter, revenge-seeking, lonely and violent, driven by a personal vendetta. In his quest to free the people of England from the corruption and cruelty that have poisoned their government, V condemns the tyrannical nature of their appointed leaders and invites his fellow citizens to join him in the shadows of Parliament on November the 5th – Guy Fawkes Day. On that day in 1605, Guy Fawkes was discovered in a tunnel beneath Parliament with 36 barrels of gunpowder. He and his co-conspirators had engineered the treasonous "Gunpowder Plot" in response to the tyranny of their government under James I. Fawkes and his fellow saboteurs were hanged, drawn and quartered, and their plan to take down their government never came to pass. In the spirit of that rebellion, in remembrance of that day, V vows to carry out the plot that Fawkes was executed for attempting on November 5th in 1605: he will blow up Parliament. As Evey uncovers the truth about V’s mysterious past, she also discovers the truth about herself – and emerges as his unlikely ally in the culmination of his plan to ignite a revolution, bringing freedom and justice back to a society fraught with cruelty and corruption.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Ft. Hood Tragedy

I had a rather cheery post planned for today, but I'm postponing it due to some news I heard via The Mrs. 's blog Sandy Boots and Sparkling Stilettos.

Yesterday in Ft Hood, Texas, occurred the massacre that claimed thirteen lives and wounded thirty. Apparently the despicable creature that committed this act was an Army psychiatrist who was upset about his upcoming deployment. This shooting is thought to be the worst ever to occur on a U.S. base. According to USA Today, The shooter is in hospitalization on a ventilator after sustaining gun shot wounds delivered by a civilian police officer responding to the crime.

I have two sets of thoughts on the matter:

My first reaction was one of complete despair for the lives lost. I'm literally almost sick to think about how terrible this must be for the families of the victims. Living a military lifestyle, we all expect to have to worry about our soldiers while they're deployed, but we should never have to live in fear while they are at home.

My second is fervent and unrestrained anger. I can not openly express my thoughts, in fact, because most of them contain explicative terms that are not fit for some of my younger readers. All I can say is that I hope he wakes up so he can face the consequences of what he has done. Slipping away quietly on a breathing machine is not good enough. He needs to experience some remorse first.

I will not try and hide it, this terrifies me. It's absolutely horrific, realizing that you have more to fear than you thought.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the survivors today, and I hope yours will as well.: (

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Dear Kyle,

I miss you.  I miss everything about you.  I miss waking up next to you each morning.  I miss trying to find the pattern of your changing eye color.  I miss the way you smile at me when I'm being silly, the smile that means you're content, and the special smile that means you love me an extra-special amount.  (Did you know that each one was different?)  I miss having your hand pressed to my knee when I'm driving, and stroking your hair while you chauffeur me. 

I miss having you by my side when I'm out with friends.  I miss the way I'd sometimes catch your eye and know we were both thinking the same thing.  I miss the way you'd find little ways to let me know you were paying attention to me, too, when we were surrounded by others:  a quick kiss on the cheek, a squeeze of my hand, or a message whispered in my ear.

I miss you when I wake up at night.  Sometimes I even roll over, expecting to find you, and then remember that you're gone.  I dream about you often, and sometimes I don't want to wake up from those dreams.  My alarm sounds in the morning and jars me back into reality where, occasionally, I shed a few tears. 

I constantly remind myself that there are only eight short months (approximately) left of this separation.  I repeat it in my head like a mantra, hoping it will make me feel better.  Most of the time it works.  When it doesn't, I remember that the time we'll spend together outnumbers the time we're spending apart by far.  I think about the future.  I plan our wedding day.  I decide what things I'll be taking to Germany when I come to you.  Somehow, I make it through those tough days. 

I love you more than I ever have before, but not as much as I someday will, as unfathomable as that is to me.  But it has to be that way, I know, because a year ago I thought I loved you more than was possible, and yesterday I didn't think my heart could hold any more love.  I guess I was wrong both times, and I know someday I'll look back and laugh at how I feel now.

Eight months, love.  Eight more months.  We've come so very far when no one thought we would.  Look at us; we're showing them all.  :)

Now I'm going to go and do some homework (while I remind myself I'm doing it to make you proud), and then I'll do some housework (which I consider good practice for when we're married), and after that I'll go to sleep (with the hope that you will call me at 2:00am so that I can hear your voice). 

Yours forever and for always,
Carrie


PS -- You really are my hero.  You know that, right?